abc123amit

Posts Tagged ‘Life’

The 5 PM Girl

In Writing on August 6, 2015 at 6:07 am

So there was this girl I used to know who
would send sad-sad stuff to my email
at 5PM in the evening. I will
call her: My five PM Girl.

If I were to take out a quick inventory today
of all the things she emailed to me
over those last few months, I could mention
the following three items (the last
three) –

One sad story
One Sad poem
One sad song

For the life of me, I cannot say with
100% certitude, the exact event, or the
set of events, that triggered her on an
email sending spree.

Maybe, it was something to do with me:
something I wrote, something I said, or
maybe something I left unsaid.

I once sent her a short story: The 100%
Girl by Haruki Murakami. It was about a
short story — of two 30 year olds, who
were 100% match for each other, only for
both of them to fall sick and lose each
and every loving memory they had of each
other.

Shortly, afterwards, I received an email:
a short story on knaves who pretended
to be knights and about a working girl
miserable because of the many unwanted suitors in her
life.

Then, once, while I was travelling deep
South, trying to nurse my broken heart (I
still don’t know what broke it; or who
broke it; or the exact day it broke) the
5PM girl sent me a link to a sad song (it
was 5 PM).

The song was about unrequited love: guy
meets girl on the subway, falls in love,
comes to know she is already taken,
doesn’t let go (because, oh!, he has a
plan). The song ends with the guy
realizes the futility of his love. He
takes takes off his shoes, watch, and
dives off a bridge into a river. It was
kinda sad.

Sometimes, when we met, she would look at
me, and say: “Why so sad, Amit?”.

I would mumble something about the
weather, some vague illness, centuries old tiredness, but never the truth: that it was the meeting and the leaving her that left me sad…

There is a lizard dying under my table.

In Pets on December 5, 2012 at 2:41 pm

There is a lizard dying in my room. It has been dying slowly for more than a week now. A week ago, I found it lying near my bathroom door, motionless. I left it alone, fearing it would crawl up my thigh, or bite me, or worse. Do lizards bite? They certainly look like they do. The next day it was still lying there in the same position I left it the previous day. Curious, I prodded it with my toe, only to make it writhe in pain. Since I am pro nature, pro animal (I eat fish, chicken and goat meat though) I left it alone, although, I must tell you, the thought of throwing it over the balcony did cross my mind for a second.

At first I thought it was molting. I looked at the lizard and said “Hmm… Too pale…Maybe it is molting” Since I consider it a bad habit to disturb folks while they are in engrossed in the very private act of changing clothes, I let the molting lizard  alone, thinking, it would go away in its own sweet time, when it was ready, or when the full moon rose over the horizon, or whatever. But it didn’t.

Day four after my first rendezvous, I found the lizard strangely splayed on the floor. There was blood on the floor and one of its eyes was hanging out. The blood looked very human like – very dark like the kind you get on your hand after squashing a gorging mosquito.  The only explanation was that somebody had stepped on it, might’ve been me. It has been lying there for three days now. At first I thought it would recover and go wherever lizards go when they feel better. But I don’t think this one is going to go anywhere. It looks grotesque with its head bent at a ninety degree angle. I prodded it to see whether it is alive. It is still alive, but barely.

How on earth do you save a dying lizard? You know there are forums dedicated to saving dying lizards. Apparently lots of them just roll over and die causing varying degrees of discomfort to you and me’s of the world. I find it gratifying that people find the time to take care of dying lizards. I mean what kind of humanity would exists if there were no one to take care of dying lizards.

Here are the top Three Results to “how to save a dying lizard”

1)      Help! Dying lizard

Sunlight and water can save your dying lizard. Apparently the author resuscitated a dying lizard by giving the lizard some water to drink.

(http://www.reptileforums.net/forums/showthread.php?44302-HELP!!-dying-lizard)

Pretty girl pitches in with her bit. Ok. I Like her.

2)      How do I save this dying lizard?

Take dying lizard to wildlife rehabilitation. I don’t think my lizard is in a state where it can be moved to the neighborhood ICU.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110706100921AAGMpr7

3)      Dying lizard, put it out of misery or nurse it

Dying Lizard Question:

“There’s a small lizard on my back porch, I saw it upside down and assumed it was dead. As I turned the body over, moreover to dispose of the corpse in the nearby lawn, it twitched, eyes blinking. I lifted it right-side up, it’s skin stuck to the concrete, gently ripping as I moved it. The gash was already there with a solidified pool of blood beneath it.

What in the world should I do!? I feel so bad for this thing, just lying there unable to move. I tried seeing if I could get it to move, but I think the spine is cracked, the gash that looks “almost” fatal is near it’s brain, to which I assume it injured some motor functioning areas. Whatever the cause, should I just put it out of its misery? And how? Or should I try nursing it back to help? Would rubbing alcohol or hydrogen peroxide help the gash on its back or would it injure it’s brain even more? Please help! I can’t help but sympathize with this pour creature.”

Answer

“You need to put the lizard out of its misery. That lizard is beyond nursing back to health. If you take it to a vet, the vet will charge you a couple hundred bucks to tell you there’s nothing he can do and will euthanize it. I’ll get thumbed down for this, but you need to do it as quickly and painlessly as possible, and unless you have access to Euthasol (Sodium Pentabarbatol cocktail, a controlled drug used for euthanizing animals), you’re going to have to do what some people would consider gruesome. Get a good, sharp scissors or pruning shears and quickly cut off its head. Alternatively, you can smash it’s head with a quick, well-placed blow from a hammer. As I said, some people will think that’s gruesome, but it’s quick, and any pain it feels will only be for a split second.”

I like this one…

Get a pair shears and off with its head, or if you’re not squeamish, get a rock and squash its head. Get it done. Be practical. Save money and save your soul.

“You can also put it in a paper bag and place it in the freezer for several hours. That will kill it, but the ice crystals that form in the tissues will cause it excruciating, prolonged pain while it dies.”

This is not done.

I am not going into the other help pages. It is all so depressing.

Post Script

I wrote the above paragraphs yesterday. Today for the life of me, I can’t find it under the table. It is gone. I can’t find it.

Lights Out Please

In Uncategorized on April 16, 2012 at 1:52 pm

When was the last time you looked at the sky and marveled at the gently shimmering star lit quality of the night sky?   Maybe, you noticed when you were a kid. But now you are too hypnotized by the bright lights coming out of your big LED T.V, laptop or the smartphone to see or register anything. Seduced is the proper word. Seduced and hypnotized. Hypnotized and seduced. Squiggles and add the tiny dots.

The only time this hypnosis wears off is during a power cut. Atrophied senses grapple at first to come to terms in a world without light. Slowly, you are able to sense long forgotten sounds and sights: a cat mewing registers which you would have missed earlier. Your eyes start discovering new things. The pupils contract to register information.

I see the spider webs on the ceiling. I spot a spider tightening its web. I see stars in the night sky. I see the placid white moon in cloudless sky. I remember some lines of a poem.I learn something new. Only when you have distilled your life to the bare necessities do you really start to hear and see.

What else? I strike a match. I light a candle. The flame wavers a little. I see a moth kamikaze into the flame and burn with a fizz sound.  I touch the melted wax with my fingertips. I feel the heat slowly make its way through your flesh. Dab some of the melted wax on the floor.. Peel it off the floor like paper when cold. Turn on the radio. Tune into something soulful. Stretch out on the floor. Close your eyes. Relax.

I did all of that. Honest I did. The wax has yet to come off the floor. The mosquito bite still stings. But it felt great to be cut off from my LED T.V, laptop, smartphone…  I saw the sky. I saw the stars. I saw the moth kamikaze into the flame, splutter and die. I did some shadow puppetry in the candlelight. I made a deer dance on the wall. I made two deer dance on the wall. I wrote some poetry in the candlelight. I remembered some lines of a poem. So, Will I do it again? Do I wish myself many more electricity less nights? No way! I am too connected to World Wide Web, to my T.V., to my mobile, to my iPod to dream of a life sans electricity. And I got to check my Facebook updates too. How would I do that in a world without electricity?